A Message from Katrina

First of all, my heart, thoughts and prayers are with all of the victims of this horrible storm. I cannot imagine what their lives involve at this time and right now I am thankful that my only inconvenience is paying $3 for gas. If that is the only hardship I endure right now, friends, I count myself blessed.

OK, so yes, my name is Katrina. I am not a damn hurricane, although my husband really thinks he should qualify for some sort of Katrina disaster relief. I know that this is first and foremost on everyone's mind, but I'm a little tired of having the following conversations:

The Hurricane: Good afternoon, this is Katrina how can I help you?
Dip wad: That's a crappy name to have right now huh?
yes, I'm sure my parents named me Katrina knowing that there was going to be a storm bring unspeakable devastation to Louisiana.

The Hurricane: You can fax that to Katrina at blah blah blah
Dip wad: Wait, slow down, what was the number again? I got hung up on Katrina and missed it, but I'm sure you've heard it all.
Yes, I know...there's a damn hurricane named Katrina.

The Hurricane: Please put that to the attention of Katrina
Dip Wad: Do you spell your name the same way the hurricane spells its.
Hmm..I didn't know hurricanes could spell, but I reckon that'd be how I spell it.

Dip Wad: We have a girl here named Catrina, but she spells it with a C. How do you spell yours?
The Hurricane: With a K
Dip Wad: Oh, so you really are the hurricane!
Yes, yes I am and you better watch out or I'll blow your ass away.

The Hurricane is so going to be my new stage name, for stripping, wrestling, stand-up comedy nights, whatever. I can't wait for the "I survived Katrina" t-shirts to come out. I'll promptly run out and buy one for my parents.

I think the craziest part about this is that nothing ever says Katrina, not those stupid little license plate thingies or the little coffee mugs or anything that sports names. Dad said last night that now we know why they don't put Katrina on things, it's because they just can't handle it. I like that. I like the thought that the world just isn't ready for Katrina and there are only a few select people that can handle the likes of me.

Hurricane Out.