Black Friday

I have so many stories to tell from the 4 day visit of my family, they really do give some awesome material, so ya’ll might be hearing about my Thanksgiving weekend for a long time. Deal with it.

My Mom, brother, dad and I braved the mall on Black Friday. We don’t go all crazy at 6:30 in the morning and don’t fight for the deals. We just go to try to get some nice Christmas presents for a good price. Last year Adam and I cleared out a store with our laughter, this year...well, we weren’t quite as goofy. I was actually very well behaved and only made funny eyes at one lady that was rocking a windsuit w/ white nylon socks and black heels. It was one for the fuggers.

In one department store they had a large display of rocking horses. Nice brown wood and leather ones. We had to walk right past them as we made our way out of housewares to the elevator. I was behind Adam and saw him very nonchalantly start each one rocking. Cute. Then there was the next display. A display of Unicorns. Unicorns that made noise when you pinched their ear. Dad did the pinching, Adam did the rocking, mom and I did the laughing because when it was all said and done it sounded like a damn stampede with the trotting and whinnying and the huffing. We loaded the escalator and enjoyed watching way too many people stop to watch the unicorns as if they truly were magical.

Then we met Chris and Amanda for lunch. It was Mexican, it was yummy and very filling.

On Saturday we braved the outlet malls in Hilton Head. We stopped at the first one and it had some good stuff, but nothing really exciting happened there except I got kicked out of the store by Chris and Mom for some Christmas purchases and told by my dad that they don’t let stinky little dogs in so I had to stand outside. Haha. On the way to the second we grabbed some food at McDonalds. I got chicken nuggets w/ sweet and sour sauce. While pulling into traffic, bubby (Adam) hit the gas a little aggressively and dumped sweet and sour sauce all over my purse making me smell like a McDonald’s playground. We were sure that little kids were going to follow me around licking my purse. We even had a plan that I could put a bunch of kool aid packets in my purse to throw at the kids as they gathered, but I had no luck and attracting the munchkins. Darn.

THEN we were in Ralph Lauren and I was looking at the towels and pulled one out to see how big it was. A saleslady of course wanted to help me and when she asked if yellow was what I was looking for (it’s the color that was closest to me when I got curious) and I told her no, she snatched it away from me as I was folding it back up. So I pulled out another one and looked at how it was folded and said loud enough to be heard “Oh, this isn’t folded that special, this is how Mom and I have ALWAYS folded towels, I could have done it 5 seconds” and shoved the new towel back into it’s hole. Stupid bitch had to use the bed to fold it properly. Too bad I didn’t wipe some sweet and sour sauce on it. Heh.

Think of me tomorrow as I'll be in court fighting my speeding ticket. The one for a whopping 8 MILES OVER THE SPEEDLIMIT! Is that ridiculous or what?